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My Motherhood Journey

By Modupe Awe

Motherhood has taught me a lot.

I have learned to love, learned to share, learned to care, learned to sacrifice, learned to cry, learned to forgive.

I recall the months leading up to the delivery of my daughter, I pondered on what kind of mom I’d be. The permissive type? The strict type?

So many of my friends had always told me about how strict of a mom I’d be. This kind of got into my head as I took pride in values and culture. So I hoped in the Lord that he’ll show me the way.

I thought of my husband, thankfully he compliments me. Surely he will be the softer side of me in this journey.

Reality hit the first few hours I spent with my little one.

All the strictness in me melted. My baby was over 4kg and look every inch adorable. In the blood and pain I was left to tend to her even in the early hours of her stay on earth. I admit, it was not love at first sight. The love I feel grew deeper by the minute.

Now I find myself being the permissive type, throwing all my guards away for my 2nd true love.

Allowing my husband take the strict role seemed like the best thing to do.

She has captivated my heart so badly that I find myself doing the opposite of what I’ll usually do.

Now she’s 2+ and ever so active. I already find myself praying for her husband. How quirky is that? I never imagined how sprung I’d be on her.

Looking for a suitable preschool for September has been a spiritual warfare. Never have I been so finicky, trying to ensure I get something right.

One thing I can state plainly that I do understand is I can never do this without the guidance of the Holy Spirit. Thinking back to the days when she was tiny and had a flu, who gave me the courage to handle her? Deciding to drop her off at the crèche when she was barely four months, who gave me the strength?

As much love as I feel for this child of mine, I have come to realize that God loves her even more. He has designed her path for the best and I, the vessel unto honor to help her get to her destination.

Here is to all the mothers and mothers to be out there, you are not alone. No one knows how it feels unless they walk in your shoes. No one understands unless they’ve been there. We can only try to be each other’s cheer leaders!

Cheers!

 

About the Writer

Modupe Awe is a Daughter, Sister, Wife, Mother, Writer, Blogger, Adwoman, Social Media Manager, basically a bag of talents. She finds joy in building her home and working in the Ad industry in Nigeria. She blogs at www.chronologiebymo.wordpress.com

Find her on Instagram - @chronologiebymo where she posts quotes that inspire and motivate.

 

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